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Tuesday 27 August 2013

A Professor Writes

Professor (emeritus) Arbuthnott: 'Modern' man.
Dear Sir

I was pleased to read of Alan Bance's disgust at Wendy Piatt's use of the word 'modern' to describe Post-92 universities (letters, 22 August 2013).


Whilst of course I accept that we must all pay lip service to egalitarianism and level playing fields, and that we must pretend to include the former polys in the university fold, Piatt and others should realise that only universities of a certain age have a primary right to all positive adjectives.

Thus, Russell Group universities have sole custody and use of 'modern', 'progressive', 'world-leading', 'clever', 'good-looking', 'popular', 'funny' and 'sexy'.

Post-92s can use 'flea-bitten', 'lacklustre', 'loner', 'weird', 'a bit EMO', 'kept themselves to themselves', and 'I didn't realise they had access to firearms and violent video games'.

I hope that clarifies the issue.

Yours

Prof Piebald Arbuthnott (emeritus)


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